Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Point by Point: The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian 7/10

Our heroes return to Narnia and find it rather less magical. Probably due to all the Spanish dudes wandering around killing talking animals. Stupid spanish dudes. Well, save for our other hero, Prince Caspian. It's up to him to fight his own people and give Narnia back to the fantastical-yet-oppressed minority.

The Good: It's actually entertaining, which puts it head and shoulders above its predecessor, The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe. The kids are also 10 times less annoying - I actually don't cringe every time they speak. But really, it's the special effects and battle sequences that make this movie - if not quite Lord of the Rings quality, they're exciting and a blast to watch.

The Bad: The story is a bit hacked together, and no one really steps up acting-wise (save for Peter Dinklage, doing a great job as the dwarf Trumpkin). And apparently Aslan, the protector of Narnia, is also the King of Passive Aggression - just because someone didn't come say hi to him when he momentarily appeared, he let's hundreds of people die. Jerk. Really, hard to be happy at the end of a movie when the deus ex machina could have easily happened an hour earlier.

The Ugly: The old Hawk-lady was seriously creepy.

Points Pondered

  • Reason 3,234 You Shouldn't Trust Movies: Lions are NOT as cuddly as they appear. Sure, giving one a hug would be probably awesome for like 5 seconds, but then you are missing a large chunk of your torso.

  • For supposedly having a lifetime to grow up before returning to their childhood bodies, the main quartet sure act like kids. And we won't even delve into the whole sex issue. Although I guess options are limited if they only other humans are related to you.

  • It's amazing how the two actors' sword-fighting skills went completely downhill after they took of their helmets. I wonder why THAT happened.

  • If you're an army and the literal field of battle turns against you, you'd probably best try again another day.

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